Arctic Valley Adventure

We ventured up to Arctic Valley looking for some snow....not much there yet but a great dose of fresh air! Actually got to wear the moby wrap today for the first time. The dogs were pretty happy as well.

Who knew

Today is day 6 and last night was tough....the breast feeding was extremely painful and I was in tears while feeding her. She is a very hungry baby and was eating every hour to 45 minutes...she just wasn't getting full. We were feeding for 30minutes to 45 minutes so I had about 30 minutes of down time to heal.....a recipe for disaster. Plus this meant no sleep time at all during the wee hours. So finally around 4 last night I broke down and fed her formula. We had researched and chosen the best organic formula we could find and had a few on hand...just in case. Thank god! She guzzled it down and crashed for 4 1/2 hours straight...that felt like sleeping through the night to me. I cried and felt guilt, disappointment and anxiety for choosing formula...I know breast milk is the best and it was only day 5.

After a nice stretch of sleep I came to terms with this. My boobs needed a break to heal and I was no good as a mom if I was in pain, tears and on the verge of a breakdown. Also I thought of some great moms and dads I know who haven't been able to breast feed for a variety of reason and their kids are awesome and no worse off. I guess I needed to be less hard on myself. I am quickly learning there are so many emotions that come with being a mom and letting go of the negative ones like guilt is crucial.

Around 6 I got up and self expressed some milk, then at 8 I pumped. I was able to get a huge bottle and I felt so proud. The pump was much easier on me and less painful. She had 1/2 of that bottle and crashed again. I think I can get ahead of the cycle and take care of myself and my baby. If I have to supplement, all that matters is that she and I are both happy and healthy. I think we were exhausting her as well with the tons of feedings that weren't really filling her belly...because as I type she is crashed in her moby wrap happy as can be. Completely knocked out!

The journey of learning and love continue.

Cheers
Janelle

Day 3-walk in a park

Today we got outside to enjoy the warm fall sun and fresh snow on the mountains. Mike wore the baby bjorn and the fresh air did us all good.

Ocoee's birth story

We woke up after not getting much sleep the night before. It was liking waiting for Christmas. We took the doggers for a walk in Russian Jack Park on a beautiful morning. The clouds had burned off and the sky was blue, setting off the peak gold of the birch trees with the mountains in the background sprinkled with snow....a great day to be born. A gaggle of geese flew over us waiting for us to vacate the park before they landed and took over the soccer fields. Everything was crisp and fresh.

Of course once we got home we realized Guiness had cut her foot and was bleeding all over the floor, so we had to quickly bandage her up, taped on a smart wool sock and zipped out the door to be at the hospital by 11. Once we were checked in things went pretty quickly. Mike was very nervous and I was getting less nervous. It was hitting me we would have our little girl with us soon. Once in the OR we put on our playlist and then Mike was beside me. I didn't love the feeling of not feeling but once it was all numb and Mike was there I was chatty cathy...I chat when I am nervous and I think the oxogen they were giving me mad me a little loopy.

Literally 20 minutes in Dr. Hinkle held her up and we saw our baby for the first time. She gave a big lusty cry and was pink and chubby. They asked Mike if he wanted to cut the cord and he said no....Of course I told him to get over there and cut it. He looked so nervous and unsure....just totally freaked out. He had Ocoee in his arms within minutes and brought her over to me to see.....she was so perfect and adorable. I was instantly in love.

I had to go to the recover room for 30 minutes and it was ok, not a single issue all was well. I am actually really glad we did the c-section. Everyone was betting how big she would be...I said 9 pounds 12 ounces but was off...she was 10 pounds 10 ounces! And had not moved into my pelvis at all....so she was not coming out anytime soon.

Once we were together in the room I was floored by hubby. He was now this expert dad. He had her in his arms and swaddled and looked like he had been doing this for years...just 30 minutes ago he was so panicked looking. I have to say how amazed I am by him. He changes diapers, helps me breast feed, took care of me and Ocoee and looks at her as if everything she does delights him. His is an amazing dad. I fell in love with him a 100 times over on her day of birth.

We breastfed right away and that went pretty well. We are still in the hospital waiting to be released. She is sleeping very contently beside me right now. I am going to check her diaper. We loaded her up in her Husker onesie to watch the Nebraska game....not fun but I just looked at her when it got real ugly. She is now officially 1 day and 8 hours old, and she has changed our lives forever. I am so unbelievable happy to have her in our lives.


10 pounds 10 ounces
21 1/2 inches long
2:23 pm
lots of dark hair
slate colored eyes that will be ........we will see
she loves to use her hands and be cuddled


Welcome and Happy Birthday Ocoee Dael Fey!

It's Friday!

So because my hubby and I gamble on everything and make ridiculous wagers about the most minuscule details we of course waged a bet on the due date of our little Ocoee. This was months ago and the prize was a guilt free day of time to ourselves to do whatever we wanted (pedicure, gym,spa for me and most likely beer and fishing for him). The official due date was 9/24, he picked 9/16 thinking she would be early and I picked 9/30 thinking she would be late.

The good news is I win!! I am trying to be very positive because it has come down to us having a C-section. This is what we wanted to avoid the whole time. We were worried about the recovery and possible complications of C-section as well it not being the birthing experience we had pictured in our heads. Due to her being late and also measuring big for so long we knew it was a possibility. After the doctors and us trying for 3 weeks to get things going by various methods we are thinking she is not moving into the pelvis like we need her to. Also due to my health issues with my cervix we are afraid that there might be scar tissue on the cervix that could cause issues.

It took us awhile to agree and we did try to wait a week so she could come on her own but it looks like the csection is the best decision. I would never forgive myself if I tried to have a different birth and it caused her issues. All we want is a healthy baby and a hopefully a quick recovery.

So we are doing the final preparations and heading in Friday to bring our bambino into this world. 41 weeks ago we were sitting on a beach in Maui watching babies play in the sand and in 2 days we will have our own baby. I am excited and nervous and 1000 thousand other emotions I can't put into words.

Tomorrow to prepare I will make a batch of halibut chowder that hubby can eat for a few days, make muffins to take to the hospital, clean the house yet again, walk the doggers, and buy some good chocolates for the nurses who will be helping my recovery and taking care of us and the baby.

Exciting next 48 hours.

Cheers
J

checking my baggage

So I am trying to let go of stress and go with the flow. Ocoee will come when it is right and I need to trust my body can deliver her and she will be healthy.

To help me I went to the Gumbo House and had an amazing shrimp poboy...for a cajun girl far from the Vieux Carre it hit the spot. And I had a great encounter with a student whose parents run the shop that made me smile.

Also check out this website where you can drop off your baggage and also read someone's worries and send them a song to listen to. Very cool concept. Check it out. http://www.emotionalbagcheck.com/
Can't wait to get my song back!

Cheers
J

Due date has come and gone

So the bambino didn't want to come out today...although this is her official due date. I am really hoping for tomorrow. Not sure if I want to go back to work next week or not, my comfort level is getting pretty low for sitting at a desk all day. But she could be another week or two before she comes. Since she has measured so big I don't think I can go that long......Focusing on mind and body connections and sending her welcome out vibes!

Cheers
Janelle